what is next?

It is difficult to describe this feeling

but it is familiar,

it feels similar to something I have felt before.

I have been hiding in my mind for a long time,

it’s time for me to step out now and experience living again.

The last couple of years were extremely challenging for me

and like other hardships of the past

I get through it.

This feeling feels a bit like fear and trepidation.

Butterflies in my stomach.

Change, the unknown, things that can play with your mind

if you let them.

And I will let them, but I will not let them control me.

An after thought,

things won’t change until I start changing things.

I can’t go on living the way I have been living,

hiding, exploring, healing the certainties and the unknowns

that are all in my mind.

This feeling is like standing in a quiet moment

and watching a stream run by

and feeling that I can give in, and let go of something

and then simply, join the stream and go with the flow.

I am at a place now where I can integrate my experiences

into the person that steps outside and says,

“I am here”.

16 thoughts on “what is next?

    • Thank you so much Rosaliene, you signaled something that is very important for me for a sustained move forward, too take things slowly, one small step at a time. It is what will help me, thank you so much for the kind and gentle nudge. Truly, Harlon

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    • Thanks Val, your message meant a lot to me. I think my challenge is I find myself at this place of empowerment, but I don’t fully embrace it, and often get hindered by self-doubt or fear of the unknown. You are right, I am not alone and I hope to find the inner-strength and count of the strength of those around me to “launch”, slowly, but surely. Respectfully, Harlon

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    • Thank you, that’s a great way of putting it. It does feel like a celebration, one which I hope I can fully embrace.
      I have been thinking of you and how things are on the wonderful West Coast, I do miss the beauty of Vancouver
      and all of it’s gems. I hope you are able to enjoy all the splendour! Big hugs, Harlon

      Liked by 1 person

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