I am on vacation

but today I am in so much pain

I fear today will just be a staycation

in my gloomy room

all alone,

keeping the sunlight away,

I came to escape the gloom.

I wish I wasn’t built like this,

the three little pigs could have a feast on

because none of my walls are that strong

they could see right through me.

The weather at home

is so depressing,

and where I am now is hot and liberating

but I can’t seem to walk away

or walk too deep into my paradise lost,

it feels overwhelming

I want to go to the beach,

in fact, I want to get lost,

but it’s a destination I doubt I will reach.

I want to bridge the bridge,

but I am trying to figure out how

to cross it, when I feel weak

to live with the lessons that pain teach.

Well, I made it through it,

it wasn’t pretty to watch

there was no grace

but I just moved along, at my own pace.

I kept my promise,

you may want to keep your distance

because I may just fall,

and people will think I am just another drunk tourist.

Who cares what others think?

If I can just be in the pain

then maybe I can do more than I think.

Maybe not everything,

I can’t fix a kitchen sink.

So I walked to the beach.

It wasn’t easy

I’ll tell you that

when it’s only you

and no one to help you with that,

but sometimes living with pain

is that you just have to try to go for it.

14 thoughts on “Vacation

  1. Hoping you find relief in the sunshine, Harlon. You deserve it, bro. Just got back from a two week trip to take my wife to the doc–chronic pain, chronic this and that, chronic something. Chronic anything leads to chronic uncertainty, and it all eats away. So I know the spiral. May you ride the updrafts of confidence and color and compassion, and know freedom from pain…

    Sharing joy with you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am honoured to be sharing the joy with you.
      On another note, chronic is such a tough word and a tough state be in. I am wishing wellness for your wife and that she finds, probably by many different ways of thinking and feeling, that she finds escape or at least able to step away from the overwhelming component of pain.
      You’ve got each other – treasure that – because that is the best medicine.
      Peace, Harlon


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