I don’t know what I am feeling

sometimes. My life is not compartmentalized,

there is not structure, work or leisure

time with a partner,

it’s just me

and it feels like

that feeling I don’t know.

It feels like my life is a smear

there are no edges or boundaries

and what I feel is

the smear.

I am not one colour,

I am not in one spot,

I am just a blend of colours

a blend of moments.

I am facing a final curtain

of mixed emotions

there are things of which I am certain.

I am

I suppose

just in my moment.