Late into the night my feeling defeated turned tide and I felt a lot of good things. Patience is a virtue. I know that. I don’t feel patient and what patience I have feels tested. If I talk about it, that is one way to become strong, leading to balance. Or at least to be in that ballpark.
I am thinking that I have the strength and the courage to change how and where I ground myself and establish safe boundaries. I think I want to start growing again, it’s the way I am. Patience is a virtue. I have felt overwhelmed but that’s a thought. Everything around me is hidden behind the thoughts that will take me to where I want to go and who I want to be. I am starting again, but it sounds like I am restarting everything all over again and I will be somewhere better, or do I think I will go back to the same place I am now.
There has been melancholy inventory.
All of this or that will happen, no plans or deadlines. Not now.
Don’t make a big deal of everything, it’s just a lot of thoughts.
Think before I grow?
Ask before I take?
Laugh before I leap.
When change stops happening in so many ways, I wonder where I will end up. Will I feel that I know who I am? Will I find myself?
If that is what I learn, then the moment of learning starts with me loving myself again.
How will I feel?